Proverbs 22:6 says, Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
I have always loved the wisdom found in Proverbs 22:6, striving to embody its teaching in front of my grandchildren. There was a memorable day when I saw this scripture come alive in a very real and personal way.
More than ten years ago, Bryson and Brailee, my sweet grandchildren, spent the night at my house. Later that afternoon, we took some time to visit with other family members for a couple of hours. On our way back home, the kids let me know they were hungry. I reassured them, saying, “Okay, I will cook as soon as we get home.” To my surprise, Bryson quickly responded, “Can I help, Nana?”
“Sure, buddy, that would be great!” I replied, happy for his eagerness to participate. But as we entered the house, Bryson paused and turned to me. “Nana,” he asked, “can I cook the meal all by myself?” At just nine years old, I wasn’t sure if he could manage the entire meal on his own, but I agreed to let him try.
I watched as Bryson gathered all the ingredients and utensils he needed for dinner, displaying remarkable organization and focus. Without hesitation, he set up his workspace, arranging everything neatly around him to ensure he had easy access while cooking.
As he began preparing the meal, I noticed he was cooking four different dishes simultaneously. This multitasking impressed me, especially considering his young age. While I felt a bit apprehensive and stayed close by to offer help if needed, Bryson remained fully confident and happy about making dinner for us. His excitement and self-assurance in handling the task made it clear he was eager to do his best in preparing his meal.
During the meal preparation, there were a couple of moments when I considered stepping in to show Bryson how to do certain tasks. However, each time I glanced over at him, I saw that he was managing just fine on his own. He handled the ingredients and utensils with confidence, he clearly knew what he was doing.
After observing him for a short while, I spoke up and said, “Bryson, I was going to show you how to do all this, but you seem to know what you are doing without my help.” He smiled at me and said, “Nana, I have been watching you for nine years, that’s how I know what to do.”
It was a gentle reminder that others, especially children, pay close attention to our actions—not just our words. While we can instruct a child on what to do, the most powerful lessons come from what they observe in our behavior. Children absorb far more from what they see us do than from what we simply tell them.
In Bryson’s case, he gained the confidence to take on the challenge of cooking by watching me perform the same tasks over and over again. My consistent actions provided him with a model to follow, empowering him to step up and accomplish the task on his own. Through observation, he learned not only the steps involved but also the self-assurance needed to succeed.
While it is certainly valuable to tell a child how to handle emotions such as anger or disappointment, there is an even greater impact when we demonstrate these behaviors ourselves. Children pay close attention to the way adults respond to challenging situations. When we consistently model a godly and constructive approach to handling difficult emotions, children are far more likely to adopt those same methods in their own lives.
Ultimately, kids learn best by observing the actions of those around them. They may hear our words, but it is our behavior that truly teaches them how to respond. By showing them positive ways to manage their feelings, we provide a living example for them to imitate, making it more likely that they will practice these lessons themselves.
Brailee is now fourteen years old, and it is clear that she closely resembles her mother in many ways. She not only mirrors her mother’s words and actions but also shares her temperament. This strong resemblance highlights the significant influence Breanne has on her daughter’s development. Through her daily interactions, Breanne holds the power to shape and guide Brailee’s character, attitudes, and responses. The ways in which Brailee repeats her mother’s behaviors serve as a living testament to the impact a parent can have, literally molding the life of their child by example.
Bryson shares many qualities with his mother, Breanne, but his personality sets him apart. While Breanne’s influence is unmistakable, Bryson tends to be more quiet and reserved compared to his sister. Despite these differences, both Bryson and Brailee consistently follow their mother’s example, often in ways that surpass her expectations. Their actions and reactions in various situations closely mirror those of their mother, demonstrating how deeply they are shaped by observing her behavior. This imitation is a clear sign of the powerful impact a parent’s example has on their children’s development and daily lives.
What an awesome power God put in the hands of a parent! The ability to shape the character, actions, and attitudes of a child is a profound responsibility. Through daily interactions and consistent behavior, parents serve as living examples for their children. The ways in which children mimic their parents’ responses, words, and even temperaments clearly demonstrate how deeply they are impacted by the conduct they observe at home.
This influence is not limited to teaching through words alone; rather, it is the actions and attitudes modeled by parents that leave lasting impressions. Children absorb lessons about handling emotions, facing challenges, and interacting with others by watching how their parents behave. As seen in the examples of Bryson and Brailee, both children reflect their mother’s influence in their own unique ways, highlighting the incredible power and responsibility entrusted to those raising the next generation.
The responsibility of shaping a child’s character and attitudes does not rest solely with parents. Grandparents, teachers, and other adults who regularly interact with children also play significant roles in influencing their development. It is essential for parents and guardians to ensure that the adults surrounding their children are positive influences who demonstrate godly ways and nurturing attitudes. By thoughtfully choosing the individuals who are involved in a child’s life, we help provide an environment where wholesome values are modeled and reinforced daily.
Another important lesson, especially evident from observing interactions with grandchildren, is that every child is unique. No two children are exactly alike, and as a result, a single teaching approach does not fit all. Each child possesses a distinct personality and their own individual, God-given gifts. Recognizing and respecting these differences is crucial as we guide them. By keeping in mind their unique traits and talents, we can more effectively train and support them in the way they should go, helping them grow into their full potential.
The scripture in Proverbs 22:6, in the Amplified Bible says; Train up a child in the way he should go, and in keeping with his individual gift or bent, and when he is old he will not depart from it.
The Word of God instructs us to remember each child’s unique gift or inclination as we guide them through life. This principle is evident in Bryson and Brailee, who, though siblings, possess distinctly different personalities, talents, and approaches to learning. They demonstrate that children are not meant to be identical, and it is our responsibility to appreciate and celebrate these differences. By doing so, we help our children embrace their individuality and encourage them to take pride in who they are.
Training up a child involves more than just spoken instruction; it is deeply connected to what children observe and hear in their daily lives. Our reactions, words, and attitudes serve as constant lessons, shaping the way our children learn to respond to the world around them. It is important to remember that someone is always watching and learning from our example. The behaviors we model today may one day be reflected in our children, as they often become a direct mirror of what they have seen in us.
