Sometimes, I feel that God speaks to me in the most unusual ways. I can always tell when it is Him or when it is the Spirit of God because it stirs an immediate reaction within me. The message resonates deeply in my spirit as a truth that I can instantly recognize. I had one of those moments this past week.
I suppose I should have anticipated what was coming because, even before this moment, Breanne had begun to discuss the importance of self-care. She expressed her desire for Brailee to engage in activities beyond horseback riding to help her understand the significance of taking care of oneself.
That day, Bre persuaded me to go to a nail salon for a pedicure and manicure, something I hadn’t done in many years. I used to love getting pedicures; they were one of my favorite activities. However, since my life took a downturn over 19 years ago—with my business closing, my husband leaving and remarrying, and life becoming difficult for a few years—I had lost touch with those little pleasures.
God was incredibly faithful throughout it all; He never left my side. However, it felt like the challenges just kept coming for several seasons. During those years, I faced the heartbreaking loss of my dad to cancer. Then, my younger brother Jesse, who was by all accounts a vibrant young man, suddenly passed away. Exactly one year later, my oldest sister went to sleep one night and never woke up. Those were the major losses, but I was also dealing with other issues during that difficult time. It was undoubtedly a tough season. I tried to stay positive and simply kept moving forward.
Today, while sitting in the chair at the nail salon, the young woman doing my nails started a conversation with me. She sweetly asked, “How long has it been since you had your nails done?” I replied, “About nineteen years.” Stunned, she looked up at me with deep compassion and sadness. As our eyes met, she said, “Oh no, you forgot about yourself.”
Those words struck my spirit like a lightning bolt. I had to gather all my strength to maintain my composure in that moment; I nearly burst into tears. I realized that God was speaking to me, revealing a truth about myself that I had never acknowledged before. In all those years, I had overlooked one important thing—self-care. I had neglected to take better care of myself. I no longer made time to feel special or even good. Instead, I buried myself in work and ministry and simply pressed on. I went about my days completing all the necessary tasks, but apparently, taking care of myself didn’t rank high on my list of priorities.
Yes, work is vital and ministry is important. That day, God spoke to my heart, saying, “You are more important than all those things, and you have forgotten to care for the one I love the most: you.”
Oh, how He loves us! Oh, how He loves us.
I emerged from those nineteen years in peace, with more faith than I ever imagined possible. Throughout that time, I found God to be consistently faithful. However, I believe I lost a part of myself during that season, as I often put myself last. I didn’t realize this until today.
Sometimes, that’s how life is. We go through seasons where the best we can do is keep our heads above water. In those moments, all we can accomplish is to continue trusting God and moving forward. It reminds me of a movie my grandkids used to watch, where one fish told the other fish, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.” During those times, it often felt like all I could do was just keep walking.
I completely understand that we go through different seasons in life. However, we must never forget the reason for it all. Jesus died for you and for me. He didn’t hang on that cross so we could enter the ministry, accumulate wealth, or achieve great success in life, even though those things can be part of our journey. He died, first and foremost, because He loved us. For God so loved the world that He sent Jesus.
Jesus died on a cross out of love for us, desiring a relationship with each of us. He sacrificed Himself so that we might have life and enjoy it more abundantly. He understood that we would face trials and challenges; however, I believe He never wanted us to forget that the reason He died was purely out of love. We are what matters most to Him. If we allow Him to, He will remind us of this truth, just as He reminded me on that day.
Friends, remember to pray for your neighbors and loved ones, but also take time to pray for yourself. It’s important to care for your children, spouses, and those you hold dear, but don’t forget to love and care for yourself as well. You may go through challenging seasons, as I have, but it’s essential not to lose sight of who you are. Remember, there is someone right beside you who loves you more than you can imagine. He will help you, and you can trust Him.
As silly as it may sound, every time I look down at my nails today, I think, “Oh, how He loves me!” From this day forward, I choose to never forget my worth again. I will take care of the things He cares about, including myself.
Remember…..you are the one Jesus loves. ♥️